watching the snow fall and thinking

So, I am on my couch watching Old School on TBS HD.  I’m all alone, cold, wearing my sweats and wrapped up in a blanket.  Today is the kind of day you spend with your special someone.  Unfortunately, I have no such person in my life.  Yes, I was seeing someone, who I totally realized I forgot to mention on here.  So, I guess I’ll give a quick recap.  We started dating right after Christmas.  We had a good first date and just went with it.  I never really told her what happened between Faith and I.  I guess the whole thing with Faith really kept me from opening up too much and kept me from moving too fast.  I mean, I’m not one to move really quickly in the first place, but I think it made me a little more apprehensive. But anyway, I had a great time spending time with her.  She was really nice, smart, laid-back…I couldn’t really ask for more, ya know?

So, just recently…actually right before my NY trip, I picked Anne up from work becuase her car was in the shop.  No big deal, I was more than happy to.  When I drop her off at her place, I walk her to the door and it semeed kinda weird.  Well, she said she couldn’t date someone she didn’t feel like she was going to marry.  I mean, totally understandable.  You date for a long term relationship, in hopes of it going somewhere, right?  She said it felt like we were just friends.   We enjoy the same music and have a good time together.  So, I guess what I’m wondering is, was it because there was no click?  Was it because it was moving too slowly?  Was she saying it was over?  Either way, I kinda had the “no click” feeling a while ago.  I mean, maybe it’s just because I’m kinda numb to that sort of feeling after the last relationship.  I’m not really sure.

So, with that said.  It didn’t really like crush me or anything.  Was I happy?  Eh, no.  Will I be okay?  Sure.  It sucks being alone again.  Dating is so lame.  It’s expensive (for the guys typically), can be hella awkward and well, honestly can be a big waste of time.  I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love making new friends and meeting people, but you don’t go on dates to just make friends.  Oh well, what do ya’ do?  Life goes on.

Time to watch the snow fall some more.

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